

This is the actual material our affiliates received on Wednesday, July 21st, 2010
SARAH PALIN -
DJ: The Palin camp issued a statement calling for the media to “stop ridiculizing Sarah’s minor little vocabularic errors!” Hello?
SP: Oh no, say it ain’t so, (DJ)! This is Sarah Palin, callin’ from the great continent of Alaska! Are you ridiculizing me again?!
DJ: Wouldn’t think of it, Mrs. “P”.
SP: Good, because, you know, Americanese is a living language! We should be free to make up words without fear of ridiculization!
DJ: So true. I saw where you compared yourself to Shakespeare?
SP: Yes, I did! He was not only a great playwright, but his rod & reels are the best! Todd has several he fishes with!
DJ: You know, Sarah, some people are saying there’s a difference between coining new words and just being illiterate…
SP: GASP! I am not an illiterate! (angry) When I was governor of Alaska, one of my main projects was fighting litter! In fact, I would be out picking up trash all the time! And my daughter Bristol picked up trash, too! But enough about Levi Johnston!
DJ: What about those who say you simply don’t know grammar or have much of a vocabulary?
SP: Simple; I refudiate them! Thanks, (DJ), you’re very patriotical! BYE!
TOM BROKAW -
TB: Hello again, everyone! This is Tommy “B” with NBC…and here are the top news headlines from the world of show business!
*Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino has reached an agreement with MTV to return for season 3 of the hit show Jersey Shore! Other members of the cast who had been on strike say they feel like they just got “situated!” Whatever THAT means!
*People close to Whitney Houston are saying that the singer is blowing over $300,000 a year on drugs, and could be dead within months! Her friends and family are concerned, but her dealer is panicking!
*Lindsay Lohan reported to jail to begin her 90-
*Ozzy Osbourne told reporters that he would like to play his own mother in the biographical film being produced about Ozzy’s life! Is it just me, or is pretending to be your own mother kind of Psycho?!
TB: This is Tom Brokaw -
EXTRA JOKES
(CNN) -
*His most popular soup is a clear broth named, “A Soup About Nothing!”
Singer Charice Pempengco wants to look her best when she joins the cast of Glee this
fall. So much so, that she's had Botox at the tender age of 18! The Filipino teenager
was filmed getting shots of the anti-
*When reporters asked about the Botox injections, Charice looked really surprised!
Playboy Enterprises Inc. launched a website Tuesday that it swears will be safe to browse while at work, eliminating the need for men to throw themselves over their computer screen when the boss walks by. TheSmokingJacket.com will contain none of the nudity that makes Playboy.com NSFW — not suitable for work. Instead, it'll rely on humor to reach Playboy's target audience, men 25 to 34 years old, when they are most likely to be in front of a computer screen.
*Do you mean that someone actually believed that guys buy the magazine for the articles?!